It’s Gonna Take More than Calgon

For the last two days, David has been pushing all of my buttons.

Every. Single. One.

Sometimes two or three at a time!

Whoever said two was terrible must not have been through three yet.

He is driving me crazy.

Seriously.

There were times today when I felt like the sheer madness of it all was going to make my mind explode. If insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting a different result, then David is certifiable.

We were in my bedroom this morning while I was folding and putting away laundry.

“Stop jumping on the bed.”

He jumps.

“I said stop jumping on the bed!”

He jumps again.

“I told you to stop jumping on the bed! Do it again and you’re going to get spanked.”

He keeps jumping.

“Alright! That’s it! I told you to stop. You are intentionally disobeying me.”

I spank him. Five minutes later what’s he doing again? JUMPING ON THE BED!

Just before lunch.

“I want a cookie.”

“It’s almost time for lunch. You can have a cookie after you eat.”

“But I want a cookie.”

“I said not until after lunch.”

“But I don’t want lunch. I want a cookie.”

“If you don’t eat lunch, you don’t get a cookie.”

“But I want a cookie.”

You can’t win an argument like this with David. He has to get the last word in. I had to find some way to stop the endless loop of yes and no. “I’m getting your lunch now. This conversation is over. I don’t want to hear another word about cookies. If you keep talking about it, I’m going to ignore you.”

Now the real whining starts. “Bu-bu-bu-but I waaaaaant a coooooookie. Pleeeeeease. Can I have a coooookie. Pleeeeeease. Pleeeeeease. Ah, Mommie! Look at me! Talk to me! I. WANT. A. COOKIE. NOW. GO. GET. ME. A. COOKIE!”

This is one of those mind-numbing moments I’m talking about. The whining, nagging and yelling builds and builds until I can’t think anymore. I swear everything goes white and the room spins a little. For a split second I feel like I’ve lost all control of the situation, and I’ll never get it back.

“Now you’re talking back to me. You don’t tell Mommie what to do. 10 minutes in time out. Let’s go!”

At bedtime.

“Go in the bathroom. You need to try and go potty, and brush your teeth.”

“I don’t need to go potty.”

“You have to try.”

“But I went already.”

“Two hours ago doesn’t count.”

“But I don’t want to.”

“Didn’t we talk about obeying a whole bunch of times today?”

“Uh-uh.”

“What happened when you didn’t obey?”

“I got in trouble.”

“Do you want to get in trouble again?”

“No.”

“Then try to go potty.”

“I don’t want to.”

Are you sighing, throwing your hands up in the air, shaking your head and looking up at the ceiling with me yet?

I look at the ceiling a lot during the day.

It’s less painful than beating your head against a brick wall.

“I’m going to give you one last chance, because I don’t want to spank you just before bedtime. I suggest you take this one last chance. Go. In. The. Bath. Room. Now. And try to go potty. OR ELSE!”

Finally he runs to the bathroom, and guess what?

He did have to pee after all.

Good grief!

Yeah, yeah, I know. He’s just testing me. How many times does he have to perform the same test until he accepts proof of the theory? If he were a scientist, he would have run out of grant money months ago.

I’m drained and exhausted after two days of this. I hate scolding and punishing all day long. I know I have to discipline him, but I still feel miserable about it. Right now, I’m dreading tomorrow.

I really don’t want another day of it.

I don’t think I can take another day of it.

I need to get something stronger than Calgon.

How about a whole week at a spa?

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7 Responses to “It’s Gonna Take More than Calgon”

  1. Deborah Says:

    Hang in there! I’m praying that the Lord will give you wisdom, grace, and strength…and that my nephew to will learn to obey.

  2. drunkdreamer8 Says:

    Hello,
    just wanted to invite you to my blog (If I haven’t already- I have a new home)at http://www.drunkdreamer8.com if you needed some encouragment today.
    C.Apana

  3. ndecoux Says:

    Sweetie, you’ve got two strikes against you already. #1 – he’s a boy; #2 – he’s 3. I decided to have my second child when my daughter was 2 – oh, so lovable, biddable, willing two years old. Love, love, LOVE two year olds. But, she turned three, and all I could say with a 3 year old and a baby was – oh, NOOOOO! What have I done? I will say that, after having raised 3 brothers and being graced with a lovely son…the less talking the better. Action = understanding in their book. This too shall pass ;-)…but check out Love and Logic (www.loveandlogic.com) while you’re waiting!

  4. Debbie Says:

    Oh, Colleen – I SO KNOW!!! (And THANK YOU for blogging about it!!!) Even though he’s only three, this type of episode – oer and over and over – feels like it sets the stage for ages to come and you wonder HOW you will do it and WHY you signed up for this parenting gig in the fist place!

    Even though it was one bad day, and you’ll probably read this blog post again later in the week and think, “Yep – one bad day, but look at all the joy he gives me,” I suggest taking a mommy break and running to a bookstore to buy a book that has helped me IMMENSELY. It’s called, “Transforming Your Difficult Child.”

    It doesn’t matter WHY your child is difficult. And it doesn’t even matter if everyone else thinks your kid is an angel! My two are bright – sometimes TOO smart! – and the testing started early. John and I did a pretty good job of setting boundaries, but as they have gotten older (now 7 and 9), our toddler/pre-school techniques weren’t working as well.

    This book was recommended by a therapist I started seeing this spring to help ME learn how to better react, because I hated being a mom who yells every morning and that’s what I had become. It has helped me learn to respond to them in a way that doesn’t send ME over the edge. And becacuse I am responding differently, so are they and things are really BETTER!

    Because when you are SO RIGHT: when we get into that “back and forth” mode of “conversation,” we cannot win!

    There are lots of books and lots of techniques out there, and NOTHING is a cure all, but this one has worked well for me this summer and I’m looking forward to applying the techniques when high stress rolls around again in September with school and activities.

  5. Nancy Says:

    I remember with my first one, two wasn’t so bad. But three, and four, and maybe five were pretty rough! Good luck!

  6. Mom Says:

    It’s no just you. He tested grandma and grandpa last weekend, too. We all just have to keep on being consistent and eventually he will quit trying. He knows in his head he is supposed to obey. At least he tells us I’m supposed to obey. Whether or not he understands obeying means doing what he is told to do or not do. You can be assured Dad and I are praying for you, Dave, and David. I really made potty training a matter of prayer and that was prayer was answered, so now we need to pray that he will learn to obey. We will pray for wisdom for you and Dave. I heard an author on Dobson’s program the other day. She wrote a book “One Tough Mom (or Mother). I’m not sure which was the correct title. Her first name was Julie Ann, but I didn’t get tje last name. Maybe you can find it on the Dobson website.

    Love you, Mom.

  7. Loved New Says:

    Yes, three was the hardest for me too with my son, but I have to be honest, four and five has it’s challenges too!

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